passing judgment

I try not to judge... at least, I tell myself that I try not to judge. I'm pretty sure I do judge, everyone and everything. Seriously, silly of me since I hate to be judged. I can't seem to help it. At least I try to keep my judgments to myself. I do tend to talk under my breath when out in public... "that kid should be in bed" "glad my kid isn't like that" "she'll never be like that" "please don't be like that." Or when I'm at work, "really you left the house like that?" "you're actually wearing that in public?" "oh my god, of course you're on medication/in counseling."

Last night I really thought about this. I pass judgment on other people because I see those same flaws in myself. I feel like I'm not the best parent, so I look for other "bad parents" so I can feel better. Am I a bully or what? :-(  You should see some of the outfits that I put together for work (because none of my clothes fit and I am too lazy to shop or lose weight/tone up). Medication? Check. Counseling? Check. God... I am sometimes a horrible person. And please, please, please don't ever come to my house without at least 4 days warning. I am a SLOB, a huge messy, dirty, gross SLOB and I am super lazy as well. What am I teaching my kid? I must get better and set a better example for the monster so she doesn't grow up with the same complex that I have. How did I get this way? My parents aren't like this at all!! This one is all on me.

self pity party over. :-) enjoy your day.