Anyone who is a mother, about to be a mother, or who knows a mother knows about or has heard of mommy guilt. The feeling that you're not doing enough for your child, that you're spending too much time away from them while at work, or the feelings that set in when you're trying to decide what is best for your child. For me, it's never really been about that. I don't know if I am doing enough for my monster, I have to work, and I just go with my instincts for decisions about her.
For me it's different.
I read a couple of blogs by moms who have children just a little older than mine. They range in age from being born in July 2011 to September 2011 when monster was born in October. I also have a close girlfriend whose daughter is 3 weeks older. I pay attention and notice all the little things that these moms report about their babies... when the kid is rolling over, sitting up, eating solids, reaching for things, wearing what size clothing when, what kind of diapers, when/how much formula/breast milk baby takes, what a routine is like, how naps go, and even daycare... my baby girl is not doing anything the same as these other kids. She is not doing anything at all like them and it's hard not to judge and feel that there's something wrong with her.
I know that all kids are different and develop and grow at a different rate/pace. I KNOW that. It's just so hard to remember when I hear about other kids her age(ish) and what she is not doing. Is there something I did wrong first off? Did I do something during my pregnancy that is affecting her now? Should I not have gotten induced but waited until she came naturally? Should I have made a bigger deal about her sleeping in her swing and instead put her in her crib right away? Should I not have rocked her to sleep for months? Should I be more strict now about a certain routine? Should I send her to a daycare center instead of to grandma's house while I'm at work? Should I try harder with baby lead weaning to develop her grasp/reach for things? Should I have started solids earlier? Should I stop spoonfeeding her?
I just don't know.